Not ready for the goodbye

Today I’ve been knocked off because of the nostalgia, you came up into my mind I can barely remember your face, your brown wrinkled face but still remember those amazing and sad moments we had, it’s been now 2 years and I am not stronger enough yet to face you’re gone and never come back I still cry like the first day you left us, and it’s so hard for me not to have you here with me.

I can see in my memories the first time I went abroad, and you came to tell me godbey with mom, I will never forget the tear drop which felt from you, now thousans and milion drops are falling ‘cuz you left a big empty hole in me, I need to travel in the past just to give you the goodbye hug it would have felt better insted of the sad dead you’ve got. I won’t never forgive me for not spending more hours with you and being nicer, after all I was also scared of the cancer you were going through, although the time we spent by was fair good.

I just wanted to tell you   I will never ever forget you, cuz you’ll always be a part of me, the principal pillar to get where I am. You’ve raised up everything for insted of thinking for you, you’d never put yourself first and sadly that’s what borught you the illness. If you are living another life, please share every single thing you feel at least you won’t feel like carrying a big rock with you.

Miss you so much, your daughter 

Feel what you feel

I remember that day as it was yesterday... I was in Dublin startng a new english course, getting better at my writting and speaking... I had so much fun in there but it was only for a month. I met almost all the musicians and brazilians, what else could I wish. If I could only finish every single day like this one, I would be the happiest girl in the world. 
My teacher was Liam, who hated me, or whatever. He was always asking me gramar questions, where I was the worst, he put pressure on me like anybodyelse and I am completely thankfully about that, but the last day was unbelievable, I got words wirtten on my face, in irish, english, even in portugese. My classmates and Liam, wrote the best wishes to me, I have to say that I am a lovely girl, so what did you expected? 
I couldn't belive I was 2 days from leaving this town. I was so sad but wanted to have fun. So  took my bike and surpirse the rain caught me in the midle of the Phoenix Park, the biggest and most amazing park in Dublin!! If I were in Spain probably I would started to shout disgusting words, but just a relaxing and pacefully voice came up of my mouth, i'd love to have again this sensation. Feel the small breads falling into my face, following the curves of it. 
I miss every single day what I left there a new life, a new beginning.... I just wanted to say how I missed writting here on my blog my feelings, getting liberated! 

I'll explain more about me if it just flows on me!